Sunday Morning... wake up. 6:00am. Yup, don't feel like going to Church. Not that I don't enjoy it... or think its a bad place to go; quite the opposite! But, as I wake up... I don't feel very "spiritual" or feel like worshiping. There, I said it. And what do you do, when you are a pastor; playing on the worship team, teaching a Bible class, on a Sunday morning, where you don't feel very "into" it. Do you fake it? When someone needs or wants spiritual guidance, and encouragement... Do you just try and make something up off the top of your head that sounds Spirit led? "No" is the answer.
But, that leaves me in an interesting position... I am tired, not "into" it... and a little worried about really being present in the way I need to be. This is where I decided to trust. Kinda like, "My spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak". If my "feelings" are my anchor... we are in a world of hurt. What anchors me is Christ, and his leadership. So, one leg at a time, I put my jeans on... load my keyboards and music equipment, and head to the office to get the computer for slides and get all the music ready... OK ok, I will cut to the chase.
Here is my point, and what I experienced. Though I was not in the right "mood", whether it was a sense of responsibility or a dedication to God's mission for my life... or both! I showed up! And God began to change my heart through the events of the morning... and the people I am with there. Regardless of my mood, God still moved. By being obedient... I got to be a part of his movement. "No one gets to the Father except through me". This make me think of Jesus' obedience... despite his flesh that was resistant to the cross. He sweat blood because of the anxiety of His call... but he showed up. John 11... Jesus wept, and this life doesn't end in death! That's the good news :)
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